One thing that stuck out to me at the WOF conference was this quote:
Am I not allowed to do what I choose to do with what belongs to me?
That really brought so many things into perspective for me. This body is not mine, it is His. My daughter is not mine, she is His. Every earthly thing that I think belongs to me, the good the bad and the ugly, belongs to Him.
He can do what He chooses to do with what belongs to Him.
So many times we look at our circumstances as a punishment. We “expect” healing, prosperity, and all that stuff. When that doesnt happen and God doesnt show up just exactly as we think He should, we accuse God of not caring, not working… not being present. What we fail to realize is that when we “expect”… we make it all about us. We do not have the power nor the vision to see into the future, yet we fail to trust the one person who created our future. The one being that is already there.
And it has NOTHING to do with how strong your faith is.
Last night I went to a conference in town at a local church. The praise and worship was absolutely beautiful, but once the special speaker got up and started, my heart just ached. It hurt. One thing that he said that I didnt agree with, and there were many, was that you have the power to completely move that mountain. It has to move.
What if God allowed this mountain into my life so that He could reach you, and you, and you. What if He allowed this in my life so that He could prove that His goodness is just that, good. And his mercy is just that, merciful. What if it has nothing to do with me and everything, EVERYTHING to do with furthering His kingdom. I know this ends well for me, does it you?
“It has to move!” No it doesn’t. And to say that not only insults people who have afflictions, but it also insults the grace and integrity of God. It doesn’t have to move because I tell it to. I have no power over my circumstances, I have no power over my cancer. God has complete control and I really honestly prefer it that way. Now I know what most of you are thinking : “Maybe the special speaker meant…..” No. I could justify this if he didnt say many other things that were out of line with scripture, but that was not the case and his intention was too obvious.
I believe that my mountain will move, according to Gods timing and His will. I believe that I will be healed. I believe my daughter will be healed. I don’t know which side of heaven that will be, but eventually we will get our “Ultimate Healing” and if it doesnt come on this planet, I know that this ends well for me!
To say that we have the ultimate power over our circumstances completely removes God from the picture, and my spirit is not in agreement with that philosophy. To say that “The Mountain will move” implies that if it only moves just a little, it really isnt healing. I have often said this, and I will say it again:
Do not miss the little miracles because you are waiting for the big one.
My daughter is full of small miracles. My life as a cancer patient is full of small miracles. Yet we are not fully healed.
We are in a human condition on a fallen planet.
We are not promised anything other than grace.
Everything else is a gift.
My husband left the conference and he said something that really made me stop and think.. He said “Maybe I am not as charismatic as I once thought”
I reminded him that I don’t see us as “charasmatic” or “legalistic” or “black with white polka dots”… I see us as biblical. All those other things are just labels and if they line up with word of God, then Great! But, as my dad said last night:
If it doesn’t line up with scripture, it honestly isn’t for me.
Amen….
Oh my word… there *are no words*…
This is BEAUTIFUL! Thank you for *you* Heather!
I’d like to share a slightly different perspective. I agree with you in everything you said, but I believe the Word too. I think it’s all in the interpretation. Let me try to explain.
Truly I tell you, whoever says to this mountain, Be lifted up and thrown into the sea! and does not doubt at all in his heart but believes that what he says will take place, it will be done for him.
Mark 11:22,23
God’s Word itself does tell us we have the power to move the mountains in our life, but I think the confusion lies in , what exactly is the mountain?, and how is it moved?
This is just my opinion, but I think God knows what mountains we need to face and which ones are just faith builders.
God didn’t say, if you don’t like your circumstances, tell it to change and it will…He said if you have a mountain and you believe and don’t doubt, speak to it and it will be moved. I don’t think that means it vaporizes, but instead, it is made conquerable. It is “moved and cast into the sea.” In other words if it is too hard to climb, you have the power to move it in a way that you can get around it or use it to lift you up. Picture a huge mountain cast into the sea…chances are that mountain in the midst of the sea will rescue you from drowning.It gives you something to stand on…almost like a step-ladder. It seems obvious to me that you already moved that mountain. It can’t “block” your walk with God. Instead it is a step ladder for you to share your faith and the grace and mercy of God.
Cancer is a mountain for many of us on here and one that those of us affected have to deal with……but it’s all in how we are dealing. Are we fighting an ongoing uphill battle that is wearing our faith down? If so, speak to it and put it in it’s place so that we can get around it, or even on top of it. I think God was saying no matter what mountain you face, it can’t tower over you unless you let it. The mountain is real, but it doesn’t have to stop you, there is always a way to deal with it. Maybe not to make it disappear, but to remind us it God is in control of our situation, not the mountain.
I love your blog and your heart. You are such an inspiration to me.
This is an amazing post, and a harsh (but still somehow wonderful) realization.
Thanks for sharing!
My husband and I followed the WOF teaching for years. It wasn’t until a dear friend was diagnosed with breast cancer that I started questioning the same things that you are talking about now. I began to learn to study the scriptures in context and came to the conclusion that much of what I was being taught in the WOF churches was taken out of context and had a New Age slant to it. (You can create your environment by what you say and think). We are finally in a church that teaches about the sovereignty of God and loving it. My husband and I are sitting under a preacher who knows how to rightly divide God’s Word. The more we learn about the sovereignty of God the more peace we find for our hearts and minds. May the Lord bless you as you seek His truth.
Heather, I agree so much with your perspective on the ‘moving mountains’ comment. When Jesus was on earth, he didn’t heal every person who needed it. He healed many, but often he chose which one to reach out of many who needed/wanted it (for instance, at the pool of Siloam).
It is so frustrating to hear people who believe that all you have to do is be ‘good enough’ and ‘faithful enough’ and God will heal every hurt, emotional or physical. That isn’t the way He works, and yet He will still turn EVERYTHING to good. God has given me a ‘gift’ that often feels like a punishment, but over and over again it has allowed me to seek him more desperately and help others who have the same affliction.
God is using you in mighty ways, and I’m sure he’s proud of the way you are handling the situation of your cancer.
I pray that you will ‘fly’ through the bad days of chemo this time with very little side effects!
Susan
AMEN! Very well said!
Know I am still ever praying for you sister.
Shari
I completely understand. My son has a form of dwarfism. To my knowledge no one has ever been ‘healed’ of being short. Sometimes it is a mountain to us…. how could I move it though? God put his stature in his DNA. Who am I to demand He change it? Maybe I should demand to be Italian or African while I am at it. Sound silly? Of course it is. Our heritage is who we are and it is in our DNA. I have had many over the top, super sprititual christians ask to lay hands on my son and heal him. I always ask them: “What if God wants him this way? I mean, afterall, my son can reach a group of people that we can’t touch.”
AFter that I usually get a speach, a blank stare or some just walk away but I know my God and He uses EVERYTHING for good and it not only benefits Him and others but it will eventually benefit me. We all have to pay a price somewhere. From some He expects more than others but we all must sacrifice.
Thanks Heather.
much love girl!
Very meaningful post, Heather, and you are so right, it is God doing it, in his time and his way. Without him, nothing gets moved. Through him, ALL things are possible.
Hugs ‘N Prayers,
Norma
Beautiful, Heather! Very well written, and I could feel your heart, sister.
I’m with you so very much on this post. I remember my pastor’s wife saying she doesn’t like to sing the part in “Blessed Be Your Name” that talks about God giving and TAKING away. She doesn’t believe that. Oh. And then there was the woman in prayer meeting who said that she told her friend who was having a probably miscarriage that God would never give such a blessing only to take it away, and that we just had to claim the baby’s life in faith and the baby would live. Oh. So what was I supposed to think about the miscarriage that happened to me this past April?
I don’t get why things happen, nor do I understand God. But I know that I know that I know that He loves me, and that I can trust Him with all I’ve got….no matter what happens. And I know that my life is safe in hands, for I’ve got life on the other side of eternity if my life on this side ends. Still, I have to admit it’s hard to know what to do with all the folks who sincerely believe that we are supposed to be moving our own mountains, etc.
Just as an extra note, I read a book about three weeks ago that made me feel totally loved by the whole Trinity, and it touches on this very topic in a raw way too. It’s called The Shack by William P. Young. You might enjoy it, so I just thought I’d pass it along. It is the most incredible book I’ve read in a long time.
Heather,
Life is a mountain, we all have mountains that God uses, He is using you, me if we allow Him to, and sometimes we have no choice.
The lord has given you this faith to reach others, He loves you dearly, all of us.
“i see us as biblical…” i like that. a lot! i am so tired of all the labels and boxes we create. i’m in favor of keepin’ it simple.
shalom to your heart heather.
AMEN!! Preach it, sister! Praying for you.
I am continually blessed and amazed by your wisdom and truth you so elequently speak to us. God is so awesome and I’m so grateful for you. Thank you for your transparency.
Well said–all of it.
Well done Heather! There is a difference between Charasmatic and Charasmania. Biblical is a good word. Your faith moves mountains all over the world Heather. And I am so glad that your chemo is going well this round. If I find a good prune recipe I will send it on. I wonder if you can use prunes in Mince meat pie? Very Thanksgiving ?
Hope you have a blessed Thanksgiving. I know you andyour family have so much to be Thankful for right now.
Because of Jesus, Bobbie
And the truth of it is, Heather, that when the mountains are moving that we are praying for…are they in the heavenlies…can they be seen with our eyes? Are these many prayers on your behalf and Emma’s moving some eternal mountains…bringing many to know Christ? I think definately there are many who love Jesus more and their family more and perhaps even met Jesus because of your and Emma’s stories. I pray for your healing, my sister. But mostly, I pray for Jesus to be everything in you and everything to you.
You blow my mind! Blessings, my faithful friend…
Holly
Heather, I just found your blog today. I’m amazed by you and your ability to get across the emotion of the moment. I lost my father to cancer almost three years ago, and I read your story I think without breathing. Thank you for sharing that.
This blog entry is so true. I can’t tell you how many people tried telling us we could pray the cancer out of his body, or that we could make something go away. It’s all about God. His timing. His reason. His master plan. It just is. It’s not because we didn’t pray hard enough or long enough or spend enough time warming a pew. It just is. Because God says it is. And something good will come of it, that much I know for sure.
Thanks again, from the very bottom of my heart, for posting this.