It has been 7 months since I touched your skin and kissed your forehead.
It has been 7 months since I watched you sleep and counted your breaths.
It has been 7 months since I saw your blue eyes and ran my fingers through your hair.
It has been 7 months since I told you goodbye…
I have missed you every second of everyday, yet the missing is getting easier with time. The tears are slowly being turned into laughter, and the memories are being welcomed again.
I loved you so very much.
I did my best to do everything in my power to make your life as easy as possible. I have no regrets, I would do it all again if given the opportunity. Yet, I sometimes doubt your dads and my decision that day… I dream that you might have made it, because you always did. But then I remember that look in your eyes, as if saying “I am done..” and I know that we did the best thing for you by letting you go.
That was our goal, our promise to you; to make your life as easy and enjoyable for the time that God allowed us to have you. I hope we accomplished that goal in your eyes, and that you truly, deeply understood how indescribably loved you truly were.
I am re-learning life without you down here, but when I think about you up there…. I realize that I accomplished my goals for you and your life. I realize that you are where you were meant to be, and nothing on this earth could stop you from going there.
Not even my love.
I miss you baby girl….
Thank you for your transparency, Heather. Your words of love for your daughter are so touching.
I cannot come here without getting a huge lump in my throat, my heart is so heavy for you and your loss. Sweet, sweet Emma. But every time I come here, I gain strength from your faith and the way that you never gave up on her until she told you it was time to let her go. My prayers have been with you for more than five years and are still with you. Always.
Beautiful words for a beautiful girl. Blessings Heather.
What a great testimony to a wonderfully loved girl. Blessings
Dear Heather,
Emma is also missed here, even if I met her only here at your blog. She is a great girl and you are a great mother for her.
Big Hug!
Christine
I just can’t imagine, Heather. I pray that your holidays, while I know there will be sadness without your dear Emma, are full of blessings. ((hug))
I’m so sorry for your loss of Emma, it sounds like you’re recovering, although slow. She is with God now, and boy I bet someday you will be overjoyed to see your baby again!
My heart hurts for you as tears fill my eyes, yet, I know it is NOTHING like what you have experienced. Please know you are in my thoughts.
Hurting for your broken heart tonight, yet rejoicing in Emma’s heavenly healing. Praying for you as you continue this journey.
As always, I thank you for your transparent words, for your mama’s fierce heart, for your evident love for your baby girl. May the peace of the Babe of Bethlehem fill your hearts as you move through these first holidays without her physical presence beside you, I know, however, that she will be with you, filling your days with bittersweet memories, with tears and with good laughter. You are walking this road so very, very well. Thanks for sharing the journey with us. (LOVE the new blog look, too.)
Sometimes there are no words…..but you have my prayers. Just been sharing about Emma’s story with my daughters. They send their love.
Heather…..thank you for taking us on this journey with you. i pray for you everytime i read a new post of yours. i lost my dad just over a month ago, and the pain goes so deep that i often don’t know how to find my way out. the Word just rolls right off of me these days and the only place i find comfort in the Lord is through worship music—that’s where He meets me right now. but through the darkness and the tears, i have known his peace. i know he’s there and i know he cares. and i know he will use my dad’s death to bring about beautiful changes in me. you are such an encouragement to me and i am thankful for the imapct you’ve had on my life—even through the blogging world.